A Time of Reflecting:
You have heard it said before that great joy is not known without great sadness, and no more apparent is that to me than around the holidays.
When we were younger the happiest times were holidays, not for the presents, but for the joy. My father would get a little carried away with the decorations, putting Christmas ornaments on the curtains, and one year painting the dining room red for the season. When we went to Gran’s on Christmas Day he would say that if the bread (That I think my mother made) was good then he made it, and if it was bad then Clint (my oldest brother) made it. Both of which – wonderful cooks, or at the very least, adventurous.
One year I asked for a real baby for Christmas, and was convinced that Santa was capable of bringing whatever I really really wanted (as long as it didn’t cost too much). This was the year I learned there was no Santa, which I was only too happy to share this new found information with my friends, especially my dear friend Katerina. Oh the scandal!
After my father took his own life, my family went through some rather dark times, with my mother being left to care for 6 children. The holidays just weren’t the same without dad, and I remember her holding back the tears on the first Christmas without him, for which I think some of my mother’s friends pitched in together to buy our Christmas presents.
However, now we are grown and we (my siblings and I), as adults, have decided to make the holidays happy again. Our children laugh and play, and don’t get overloaded with presents, because we know what true happiness consists of - togetherness. Two years ago I finally got that baby I wanted for Christmas, when Fiona was born – Santa really does exist!!! When Scott and I moved backed to Missouri, Scott started going with me to Christmas Eve church service (only fair since I celebrate Hanukkah with him), and then we go to Katerina’s grandmother’s house (Katerina passed away in 2001), and she puts up a tree just for Fiona and I. Last year, we shed a few tears when reminiscing about Katerina, but Fiona started playing with a dancing Santa and we started smiling. Children really do make the holidays wonderful, and happiness is a choice. Joy has returned to Christmas, may you all share in it!